Some questions I asked myself while I wrote my 2015 goals list which will be posted after I write this were:
1. What am I bored of?
2. What do I want more of?
3. What can I let go of?
4. What would give me peace of mind?
5. What am I devoted to?
Here are my personal answers.
1. I am bored of compulsively checking my Facebook to see if my statuses or what I post is either liked or commented on. I remember back in 2003 when I visited Paris, France -- I was not tethered to my telephone or my computer. I walked around, took in the sights and smells of the city, and just enjoyed my time in the present. While I did miss that instant communication, which was not rampant like it is nowadays, it was freeing. The fact that I was enjoying myself and not giving a care (the fuck it attitude that my nerdy bff Veronica and my boyfriend try to instill in me) was a welcome enjoyment. I need that back in my life.
2. I want more spontaneity in my life. I live my Monday through Friday life as a routine -- wake up, talk to my love as he is going to work, get ready for work, go to work, come home, so on and so forth. I am a creature of habit and if that habit is broken, things go haywire, i.e. me falling in my schools cafeteria causing me to bunk my head on the concrete floor and sustain a mild concussion. Now just because my Monday through Friday life is a routine one does not mean my weekends should be. The only routine thing my weekends should be is my lovely Humira shot and methotrexate pills as well as seeing/talking to my George. Other than that, if something just comes up -- I will learn to say yes.
3. I can let go of the feeling that I always need to be "on duty" and that if one of my friends is mad, he or she will be glad again. (Love that bit of advice that I received from my George). Sometimes I need to learn to say no and that if I am having my own issues; that I can not be there 24/7. It also works both ways -- if I am having my own issues, which I do, I need to know that I can depend upon my friends and believe me I do know who is there for me.
4. I think learning that just because my friends or family do not message or text or call me all the time does not mean that they do not love me. That will give me peace of mind. For some strange unbeknown reasons, I got it into my head that unless my phone is "blowing up", that I am not loved. Things/shit happen to people all the time. As long as I hear from them, I should be fine. The only person I need to hear from every day knows who he is and he makes me feel amazing and loved every day. The only thing I will say is that I am tired of the constant initiation I need to do or the lack of attention I receive. If I took the time out to send you a message say hello, get back to me somehow. Do not leave me hanging. That is a pet peeve of mine.
5. I am devoted to writing more blog posts in the future as well as the possibility of getting back into book reviews. I am not going to put a deadline or a time frame on this but if I feel the need to write/blog, I will do it more.
With that being said, here are my 2015 goals. I do not say "resolutions" as I feel that word already will lead me into failure world.
1. Keep a positivity journal. Write down every time something happens to me that makes me feel good — a friendly comment, a gift I get, unexpected luck, etc. At the end of the year I will have a journal of positivity and happy memories.
2. Read one book a week. (0/52)
3. Start my day with a positive thought at work. Utilize my 2015 Happy Notes calendar for this.
4. Watch 100 movies. (0/100)
5. Unless on the computer with George via Skype, get off the computer at 9pm.
6. Walk across the Brooklyn Bridge.
7. Attempt to go to bed every night at 11pm and wake up at 6am every day.
8. Take a class at Havens Kitchen
9. Starting January 1, 2015 — DO NOT USE THE AMERICAN EXPRESS CREDIT CARD. Learn the power of a budget and necessities.
10. Save $50,000 by December 31, 2015
11. Do not be so “on duty”. People should come to me not just to solve their problems. Start saying no more often.
12. Complete a A-Z Author Reading Challenge.
13. Finally get my drivers license!
14: Create a Positive Quote Album on Facebook and post one every day for 365 days.
15: At end of my workday, write down three positive things/what I am grateful for.
What about you? What are your goals for the new year?